Wednesday, March 6, 2013

My life as a stylist in a wedding TV show

When I found those photos of my first apartment recently, I also stumbled on a whole range of other photos which took me back on a bit of a nostalgic trip through my LBK (life before kids). I started to think about all the things I had done, all the interesting jobs I'd had, the places I'd lived, the opportunities I'd been given and those I had created for myself. I was quite amazed on reflection. And a little bit sad.

It's funny when you become a parent and a wife, because for me my identity kind of changed at that point. Because I stopped working full time, and only worked freelance for a short time, I began to identify myself as just that, a wife and mother and all my achievements, accomplishments, adventures and experiences all seemed to fade into oblivion and become the part of somebody else's life. It was as if I became two separate people.

Here's the Easter cover of BHG we shot in my apartment.
And one of the pages inside with the styling I did and we shot on my dining table
Whenever we move house or have a big clear out my husband invariably uncovers a big box of my work stuff. It's all the things I've done over the years, mostly prior to being a mum. It includes my styling portfolios, copies of all the magazines I've been published in, photos of my work, boxes of polaroids, disks of photos, old stationery from my shop, things I've made for photo shoots and the list goes on.

This is the scrapbooking cover I mentioned before. Which was shot in my living room.
Note all the photos of my family members in the frames.

He always wants to chuck it out, and can't understand why I want to lug all the old crap around with us. But I get very defensive and protective of it. It's like my life is tied up in that one box. Aside from family and our homes, that's the box I'm most proud of. That's all the things I've done that make me feel like something other than a regular wife and mother. They are all the experiences and accomplishments I've had that validate me, give me my self-confidence, self-esteem and remind me that I was something else once. I was good at stuff, I was in demand, I was paid to do something I loved and I didn't have to make excuses or justify the time it took to do it.

I could stay up all night making things for shoots, or all day shopping for props and I didn't have to worry about how much the babysitter was costing or if I was taking too long. I look back at those halcyon days and I can't help but feel a pang of jealousy for that girl and her carefree life. Of course I wouldn't swap what I have now, but they were wonderful times. I know there's nothing really stopping me going back and doing it all again, except I just can't work out how to juggle being a good mum and wife, with a commitment to the work I love. I barely have enough time to write a half decent blog post. As I type this Amelia is clawing at my feet trying to get my attention and banging her head on the chair she is stuck under! So I am amazed at women who manage to make it all work, to have a family and do what they love without having a nervous breakdown. I just don't seem to have enough hours in the day, or I'm completely crap at time management. Probably more the latter.

Anyway, this post has gone in a completely different direction than I planned. The original point was to show you this great job I had with Better Homes & Gardens back in 2003. I had been working as a magazine stylist, I wanted to be Martha Stewart, I'd been a wedding planner and had a wedding shop, and worked as a TV presenter. But I came up with a great idea for a wedding reality TV show. So I pitched the idea to BHG who I had worked with on several other projects.

The idea was to find a couple who would like to have their wedding planned by me and the team (these were the days Noni Hazelhurst was host), then get married live on TV, and have the whole thing done and paid for by the show. BHG put an ad in the paper and surprisingly didn't get that many responses. Perhaps not too many people wanted their wedding filmed. Anyway, the couple they picked were not my first choice I have to say, they weren't exactly what I had in mind. I felt they didn't understand or appreciate what I was trying to do, and annoyed me the whole way through filming because they wanted to change everything I planned and kept complaining about things. It drove me a little nuts. They didn't like my blue and white scheme for starters!

Anyway, it was about 12 weeks of BHG TV episodes which was run concurrently with a special wedding features in 3 issues of the magazine. I had about 40 pages of editorial I had to produce all up, plus film the TV show as the wedding planner, going around doing all the wedding planning things with the couple ie go to a wedding fair, visit the car hire, the florist, meet the family, try on the dress etc. It was great fun, but a huge amount of work and rather stressful to be honest.

Here's a selection of the shots we did for the magazine spread. It was all photographed in my apartment or at my parent's place in the Highlands. Saved a fortune in location and studio fees for them, plus using all their furniture as props. Lucky my parents have great taste eh!



I copied this look from a Martha Stewart Weddings mag and had a local cake maker recreate the gorgeous cake. I just adore this shot.


These blue boxes above and the little posy below are some of the things hidden in that box I won't part with. The boxes are empty, but they are so pretty and the butterfly posy is still in tact. The cake stands I bought from Martha Stewart a few years earlier when I was in the wedding business. That was when she was selling her products online, but you had to phone up from Oz to order them.


My Mum was such a help during this and sewed most of the fabric items like this ring pillow and ring pouches. I had sold these handmade items in my wedding store previously. 



Some of you may have seen these photos before, so humour me!




This was photographed on the blue wall in my apartment bedroom.




Another lovely idea I copied off Martha. These gift boxes with the bouquets resting on the top. 


I made this hydrangea wreath using silk flowers stuck into a foam base. Then made a template for the leaves which had guests names on it and their table number. 


Recognise that blue and white pot? It's been on my hallway console for a while. I pinched it off my Mum.



I love making pin wheels. They are such fun and they always look wonderful no matter the type of party.  This was shot in the guest cottage at my parent's farm. I borrowed a lot of the props from a fabulous shop in Berrima called Peppergreen, which has since closed, but which was the stylist's dream.





I made these fabric flowers and beaded flowers as boutonnieres, thanks Martha. They are all photographed on the chests of various accommodating family members!


I used this beautiful beaded flower as a topper on a birthday present once. I wish I'd asked for it back!


I look at these and can't imagine that I ever made them really. 


The model below is me, wearing the bridesmaid's dress I wore for a friend's wedding.


I made this bouquet and Mum made the veil below.


Yep, that's me. Again, saved money on models (not that I'm model standard by any means, but when you're on a shoot you have to make do with what you have and cut costs!).


That gorgeous beaded top I'm wearing above I bought from a little boutique in Soho on my trip to New York a few years prior. I bought it because Jennifer Aniston had been photographed wearing the same top and I had to have it! Sadly they wrapped it in hot pink tissue paper and my suitcase got wet on the trip home, so the pink dye ran all over the top. I was gutted!


This was one of my favourite photos. I love this pretty bouquet I made of dried flowers, all found in baskets at Spotlight. It's just one of those shots that work.

And here's how it looked in the magazine.













And here are the location shots of the actual wedding on the day it was staged and filmed with bride, groom, guests and all including all the celebrity TV presenters from BHG. The wedding was held at Lindesay House in Darling Point, which is owned by the National Trust. A beautiful Georgian mansion  built in 1834 overlooking Sydney Harbour. It was the perfect location.



This was the view looking out over the harbour and luckily it was a glorious day. You can see the camera crane to the right.


I chose square tables instead of round and luckily could get these gorgeous bamboo chairs in white to go with the beautiful blue and white tablecloths. How could you not love this colour scheme?!







I had the little blue and white candy rock made with the couples' names and a heart in the centre and made up these wedding favours.


There's the hydrangea wreath a the guest signing table.


Unfortunately it wasn't the right time of year for hydgrangeas, otherwise I would have used them as the main flower.








The wedding went off without a hitch although there was a lot of "CUT!" happening throughout the ceremony, as planes roared over or neighbours made noise. And I think they probably had to saw their vows a couple of times. So they didn't have a completely normal wedding, but given the whole thing was free they were pretty damn lucky.



Thank you for indulging me in that little trip down memory lane. Hope you enjoyed it as much as I did. Now if you'll excuse me,  I smell a dirty nappy.....

Wedding photos by Melinda Hartwright
Stills shots by Chris L. Jones


19 comments:

  1. Melinda...you are just sooo talented!!! Sydney Harbor looks a bit like where I live...I must send you a link to a wedding at the end of our street. Of course, your harbor is much bigger. When my daughter was little and I was so busy working in NYC, I hated missing so much of her daily life. When my son was born and I stayed home with him, I missed my job. They have both turned out great. What you are doing is the most important job ever and your creativity will be there when you want to get back into the work force. I am just so glad you make time out of your busy schedule for this blog. Thank you! PS. I haul around my old files, too.

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  2. Simply gorgeous Mel - you are certainly one talented lady!!! I would hire you in a second!
    S x

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  3. Good gracious - what a heartfelt post! You have raised so many points here - elements which all of us struggle with at times I think. So hard to have it all, keep all the balls in the air, stay sane and happy, feel in control....I hear you!! Don't let hubby throw out the box - it's vital.

    I kept wondering all the way through the charming wedding shots though (and it is charming, your style is very elegant) - did they actually stay married after such a a public wedding??? Would love to know. xx

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  4. Oh my goodness Melinda. What an amazing story. You did a fabulous job. It will happen again. Like A-M said on IG, these years go by so quickly.
    Kylie x

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  5. Wow! You had a fabulous past life, mine was good, but yours was downright impressive! I'd miss it if I were you, even though I love my kids to death!

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  6. Goodness you had a fabulous past life. Mine was good, but yours was downright impressive! I'd miss it terribly if I were you, even though I love my kids to death.

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  7. Wow Melinda, it's so nice to hear your story pre-motherhood. Definitely don't let your hubby throw that box out - as well as being so important to you, one day I bet your kids will love going through it! My little boy has just turned one so I'm really feeling everything you mentioned in terms of swapping a career to be a full-time mum. I'd like to think that we can have it all but it's bloody hard work just being a Mum, never mind anything else! thanks for sharing. Alana x

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  8. You seriously never cease to amaze me! xx

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  9. Melinda.....you ARE Martha!!!!!! You are sooooo talented my friend:) Nothing you do surprises me anymore. Love every single picture...and amazing in that it was years ago but everything is as beautiful then as it would be today, I love the wedding tables, flowers all the extras...it is all so elegant and timeless, just like your style so it never appears dated. They must have been heartbroken to lose you...you truly are one talented dynamo! Thanks for sharing.....

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  10. You should be very proud of the stylist phase of your life. Your work is beautiful. Motherhood is another phase, equally exciting but in very different ways. How lucky for you that you have had the opportunity to do both. Don't ever through away that box of props and editorials. You earned those treasures.
    Best...Victoria

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  11. You gave that blue beaded flower to me! I still have it - I had forgotten it's origins. I will find it and regift it to you for your birthday! So enjoyed seeing these photos again - you're one clever cookie. Xo

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  12. Lovely post! just lovely. And all so true. But remember you don't lose your creativity. Enjoy the time of life your in right now. I've chosen to work full time, early on because of necessity, now because the kids are older and I have such flexibility.(work from home most days). But I crave to take my side photography business to full time. That is a dream that will have to wait for now.

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  13. Lovely post! just Lovely. Remember that we don't lose our creativity. I chose to continue working, early on because of necessity, now because the kids are older and I have such flexibility (work from home most days). But I long for the day when I can take my part-time side photography business to full time. That dream will have to wait.
    Enjoy the time of your life that your in right now.

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  14. Wow, I don't know where to begin. This whole post is absolutely gorgeous. You are VERY talented. What a stunning wedding with all of your amazing touches. Yes, blue and white color scheme was perfect. That beaded top...sickening that it was ruined! It was beautiful! And you were a beautiful model!

    You should be so proud of the wonderful job you did! Just stunning!!!

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  15. You amaze me with all that you have done and still do with balancing a family. Truly gifted and I am so glad I found your blog. I learn so much style and decor placement from you. I love your honesty too when you post. I had read back on some of your older post and your blog is a great beautiful book.

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  16. Never throw away those memories. Amazing!! Loved the trip down memory lane. It all looked lovely and remember our journey is like walking on stepping stones. Walk each one, take your time, enjoy, be present and remember how wonderful these moments are. x

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  17. The wedding photos are lovely and the whole theme has aged well I think. It still looks current and attractive.

    This post made me sad though.

    It made me sad to read that you missed those days and feel a bit undervalued and overwhelmed in your current role.

    Maybe this is because your former career was so creative? I am a solicitor and have worked in litigation for almost 20 years (so not creative). My job has always been stressful and hard- I found having a baby and maternity leave incredibly peaceful and relaxing because it made such a pleasant break from the demands of work, clients, staff and billing. I once got a hate comment on my blog because I have found motherhood so easy compared to my work life at the Coalface.

    Balancing motherhood and a career is such a tricky act and I agree that brilliant time management is essential. I practically never sleep. A complication is when your partner's career is Full On (my partner is a barrister and he is about 1000 times busier than me and travels a lot so the Buck Stops with Me).

    Anyway these are just some rambling thoughts and I feel sad that you have lost that side of your life. Could you not Nanny the Frig Up or Au Pair it Up and carve back a part of it? Especially as it was so fulfilling and satisfying and made you feel valued?

    Life's too short not to be doing something that sustains you emotionally and creatively (says me who has a love/hate relationship with litigation and the law).

    I say hop back on that bandwagon now.

    Best wishes, FF x

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  18. Mel You have always been and will continue to be an inspiration.

    Yet another fantastic post about your past life.

    If you are not making money out of blogging you should be, as evidenced by your last post and all the sales you generated. You have so much style if I could have you do my wedding I would be beside myself. Fancy the couple complaining about the colour scheme. When you are in the hands of a professional sit back and enjoy the ride I say.
    Carolyn

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  19. Lovely wedding styling! That couple should be so lucky to have your taste and nous to do their wedding, let alone a free wedding!

    It is great to see some of your previous work on your blog. I remember seeing many of your styling and crafts in mags in the past. And I was always inspired because you made them look so simple, yet tasteful.

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